Spare Me
by gleefully-finchel
Summary: What happens when Finn takes Quinn bowling and runs into Rachel?  They have both moved on, so why does he suddenly feel so confused.  Finchel One-Shot.  Hummelberry friendship.


Spare Me

"So where are you off to tonight so late?" I ask as I see Kurt coming down the hall in his jacket. "I got a hot date tonight." He says grabbing his scarf from the hall closet. "Ah where are you and Blaine off to tonight?" He's been seeing Blaine every weekend since leaving Dalton. He stops and turns in the doorway, "Uh, I have a date of the female variety for tonight." "Oh, sorry, I just thought it was Blaine, cuz you said it was a date." He turns and walks down the stairs. I hear him yell to Burt that he will be home late and I hear the front door shut. I probably should have asked him where he was headed to. I need to come up with a place to take Quinn tonight and I'm really sick of eating at Breadstix. It would be the 3rd time this month. And I really want to do something fun this weekend that doesn't involve looking at prom dresses.

My phone buzzes on the nightstand and I look over and see I have a text from Quinn. "Where the hell are U? We going or not?" Shit. I quickly text back. "Coming now." I grab my jacket and run down the stairs. "Mom, I'm heading out." She comes out of the kitchen. "Oh are you going out tonight too? Where are you off to?" "I really hadn't gotten that far mom. Any ideas?" I ask her. "Well, maybe you should pick something you want to do for a change. It seems you are always taking her where she wants to go. I don't really see you doing any of the stuff you enjoy doing anymore, Finn." "Mom, can we not argue about this tonight." I know she isn't happy that I'm dating Quinn again. But I'm tired and don't want to fight with my mom too. But she does have a point. Maybe we could do something I want. "I'll be home later mom." I say as I kiss her on the cheek and head out the door to my car.

I pull up to Quinn's house and sit in the car staring at the house. She's not going to be happy about where I'm taking her tonight. I sigh and get out of the car and head for the front door. As I climb the front steps the door opens. "It's about damn time you got here. Do you know how late you are?" Quinn is standing in the door with her arms crossed. "Sorry Quinn, mom needed help with something." I lied. I didn't want to tell her that I spent an hour just lying on my bed coming up with excuses for getting out of this date tonight. Somehow I didn't think she would believe that aliens had stolen all my clothes or that I had a rare onset of a contagious disease, so I'm standing here on her doorstep instead. "So I'm guessing you are ready to go then?" I ask slightly annoyed. "Yes, let's go before I have to be home!" I walk her to the car and open the door for her. "So where are we going tonight, Finn?" She asks and I put the key in the ignition and turn on the radio. "Oh uh, I thought we would go somewhere fun tonight." She smiles and sits back.

When we pull in to the parking lot she groans. "BOWLING! Really Finn. You thought THIS would be fun?" "But I love bowling, Quinn. And I haven't been since we started dating. We always do what you want. Can you do this one thing?" I ask irritated. "Fine, whatever." She says rolling her eyes. "But you have to do what I want for the next 3 dates. This is going to be torture." She yanks the car door open and gets out of the car and starts stomping towards the front of the building. Well at least I get to go bowling tonight, even if she does end up throwing the ball at my head. I meet her at the door and we go to the counter to get our shoes. She complains loudly that the shoes smell funny and we walk over to put our stuff down. "They are supposed to smell funny, Quinn. It's part of the charm of bowling. Come on, try and have fun at least. I'll go get you a ball." "Whatever!" She says inspecting the shoes. I walk over to find her a ball and immediately see the little pink ball. I grab it and take it over to Quinn.

"This one should work for you." I tell her. She looks up at me in disgust. "Are you serious? You think I'm going to bowl with THAT? Who bowls with a pink damn ball. NO, I don't want that stupid ball. Get me another one." I shrug and walk back over to the balls. "No Kurt, I know they have one. I use it every time I come here." "Well I don't see it Rachel, just pick a different one." I hear them talking around the corner before I see them. Crap. It never occurred to me that Kurt might be taking Rachel out. I know what she is looking for. The pink ball in my hands is the same ball that Rachel always uses when I bring her here. I realize that I have no choice but to approach them and offer her the ball. I turn the corner and I see her standing next to Kurt frowning. She looks completely adorable and I immediately feel a pang of loneliness. Bowling was our thing. I realize this is actually the first time I have been here since she and I broke up.

"You looking for this?" I say from behind them. They both jump and turn quickly. "Finn? What are you doing here?" Kurt asks me confused. "I thought you had a date tonight?" "Oh, um." I say avoiding Rachel's eyes. "Yeah I'm on my date. But I think I have Rachel's ball." I hand the ball to her. "Thank you Finn. You know I can't bowl without this pretty thing." She takes the ball and looks up at me. "Well, enjoy your evening, Finn." She quickly turns and walks over to their table. "Bowling huh?" Kurt asks. "Didn't figure Quinn for a bowler." He laughs. "Yeah, she's not really enjoying herself I think." I say looking around the corner at Quinn who is still cautiously putting on her shoes with a disgusted look on her face. "Well, enjoy your date." Kurt says quickly and turns and walks over towards Rachel.

I watch them put their balls down and Kurt gives Rachel a hug and whispers in her ear. They both start laughing and I realize how much I wish I was with them both tonight instead of here with Quinn. I loved bowling nights with Kurt and Rachel. We used to go every other Friday night and it became quite the competition between the three of us. I watch as Rachel is throwing her ball and it drops into the gutter. She stomps her feet and turns towards Kurt with a huge frown on her face and then breaks out into a huge fit of laughter that fills the entire bowling alley. My heart actually starts to hurt at the sound of it. I turn back to the balls and grab a black one for Quinn and head back to our table. "It's about time, where the hell were you?" Quinn asks as I approach her. "Sorry, I got held up. So will this one work?" I ask holding up the ball. "Yeah I'm sure it's fine. Can we just get this over with please?" She tosses the ball down the lane and turns quickly back to the table and sits down. I have a feeling this was a bad idea.

After about 5 frames I realize I'm hungry. "Do you mind if we eat?" I ask Quinn. "What, here? You want to eat at the bowling alley?" She says turning up her nose. "Yeah, it's not bad. They have pizza. I'll just go order ok." "Yeah great." She says less than enthused. I walk up to the counter to order and I see Kurt coming my way. "Hey, how's it going? You winning?" I ask him. "Well it's not like Rachel magically got better just because you guys broke up." He says laughing. "Yeah." I say drifting off. "So, how's Quinn doing over there?" He asks me curiously. "Yeah somehow I don't think we will be doing this any time soon." "Shame, we miss you on Friday nights." "Wait, you guys still do this every other Friday?" I ask him surprised. I had no idea he and Rachel had continued our bowling night. "Yeah, we haven't missed one yet. I didn't want anything to change just because the two of you broke up. I'm still friends with both of you." "Yeah, uh, that's good then. I mean, I'm glad you still do that with her." "You know you can come anytime you want." He says. And for a moment, I smile. I really do miss her. "Uh yeah, don't think that's a good idea. Quinn would be pretty pissed." I hear them call my name and I grab my pizza. "Talk to you later, Kurt." I say as I turn back towards Quinn.

"You didn't tell me SHE would be here." She says as I approach the table. "What?" I ask pretending I don't know who she means. "HER! Rachel! You didn't want to mention she is sitting at the other end of the alley with Kurt?" "Yeah, sorry. I didn't know they were going to be here." "Well I don't want to stay here." "Quinn, look we just got the pizza. We are in the middle of a game. Can you just finish the game. Please. Why does it matter that they are here?" I'm really tired of all of this. And honestly I've had enough. It's one night that I asked her to do what I wanted. Why can't she just do that? "Fine, Finn. But after this game, I want to leave." "Yeah ok." I say defeated. We sit at the table to eat and I look past Quinn and I see Rachel sitting down with Kurt eating pizza and laughing at something he said. She looks so at peace. So happy.

Part of me feels a bit annoyed that she's so happy. Isn't she supposed to still be upset over me? Is it even fair that I'm upset that she seems to have moved on? I mean that's what I did right? I guess you could call my relationship with Quinn moving on? Although if I really think about it, I really just went back. Back to where I was before Rachel. Back to what didn't work to start with. I look over at Quinn and she is picking at her pizza like it's got bugs on it or something. "Is there something wrong with your food?" I ask her. "Yeah, it's from a bowling alley. Isn't that enough?" she says rolling her eyes yet again. "Can you stop complaining for even a minute." She flinches and looks angrily at me. "Don't get angry at me, Finn. You knew I would hate this place yet you insisted we come here. This is your fault." She gets up from the table and grabs her purse. "I'm going to go find the restroom. I need to wash my hands. I feel dirty!" I watch her walk off mumbling to herself.

I look up and catch Rachel's eye. She smiles at me and I can feel my stomach flip. Without even realizing it I return her smile. I remember back to when I first brought her here. I was such a jerk. Bringing her on a date when I was with Quinn. Using her feelings for me to get her to come back to Glee. Just so that I could make something of my life, to take care of a baby. A baby that wasn't even mine. I remember how excited she was when I asked her to go bowling with me. She had never been before, but she was excited to go with me. She was surprised I asked her. I never did understand why she was interested in me. I'm just Finn Hudson. I'm not stupid, but I'm not exactly the smartest guy either. Rachel is smart as hell. And I've made more mistakes than I can probably count. I've hurt her more times than I care to remember. Yet when I look up, I see her staring at me with that same look she had that first day we came here. I realize I'm still staring at her and I quickly look away.

When I look up again, she has grabbed her ball and is standing in front of her lane with a determined look on her face. She sends her ball down the lane and she is standing there leaning as if she can get the ball to go in whatever direction she leans. I laugh to myself because that is so Rachel Berry. A controlist, even with things she can't control. I hear the pins hit and she screams and jumps up and down running over to Kurt. She's got her arms wrapped around his neck and he's spinning her around and all of a sudden all I can see is that day she had her arms around my neck. And the moment she surprised me by pressing her lips to mine. I feel the chill run down my back as I remember the feeling that spread through my body as she kissed me. I close my eyes involuntarily and inhale deeply remembering the feel of her lips on mine.

"Can we just get this over with now?" Quinn has returned to the table and she doesn't look any happier. I look up at her. "You know, I've been asking myself that all night." I say to her as I turn back to watching Kurt and Rachel. "I mean really, isn't that what we have been doing for weeks?" She looks confused. "What the hell are you talking about Finn?" She asks. "Getting it over with! I mean every day I come over and we look at prom dresses, or we make buttons for prom, or we talk about what you want to do and all I'm thinking is can we just get this over with. It's like if I just let you talk and don't interrupt you, it will be over with sooner. But really, I'm just thinking about us. Because that's all I'm doing anymore. Wishing every day to be over, so that I can just get it over with." She sits down across from me with her mouth open. "What the hell are you saying, Finn?" She says softly. "I think really I'm just waiting for us to be over with. Let's face it Quinn, this thing, with us. It didn't work out too well for us the first time. Yet here we are again. Why?" "What do you mean why?" She says angrily. "Why are you with me Quinn? It's not like you enjoy anything I like. You hate bowling, you get angry when I ask to play video games, I can't have an opinion about anything because you my opinions suck. So why are you with me?" I need to know the answer. I need her to tell me she's with me because she loves me. Or that she needs me. But I know even if she says it, that it's a lie.

"Finn, we are not talking about this here. We are in a damn bowling alley and we are NOT doing this now." She stands up. "Well I'm doing this. Because I don't know why I'm here with you. Why I went backwards instead of forward. I don't know why we are together Quinn. I can't make sense of it. I don't love you. So that's not the reason we are together." She turns and quickly walks towards the door. I grab my stuff and run after her. "Quinn." I call after her. She turns around with tears in her eyes. "You're an asshole." She says. "What do you want me to say to you after that wonderful speech? How do you want me to feel when you tell me that you don't love me?" "I'm sorry Quinn. I didn't mean it to just come out like that." I really suck at this talking thing. I've never been good at words, but I really suck when it comes to talking to girls. It's like the filter from my brain to my mouth broke and every thought I have just spews out like acid. "Yeah but it did come out like that. Do you mean it? Do you really not know why you are with me?" She turns away from me. I walk and stand in front of her. "We just don't work Quinn. We want different things." I say honestly. "You mean you want HER!" She spits. "I don't know. Honestly, I'm still so confused. I thought I had this thing with Rachel figured out. I thought I was over her." She looks towards the floor. "You aren't though are you? Do you love her?" "Yes" I say without hesitating. She turns and walks out of the bowling alley. I inhale and close my eyes.

I look back at Kurt and Rachel who look to be starting another game and are completely engrossed in what they are doing that they haven't noticed the argument taking place at the front door. I turn and walk out the door and head towards my car where Quinn is standing. "So you love her but you can't love me?" She says loudly as I approach her. I knew that was coming. It felt like getting punched in the gut. I don't have an answer for her. "Quinn, I can't answer that. I can't explain it. Rachel and I had something special. I can't ignore that." "But what we had was nothing? I meant nothing?" she says crying. "I didn't say that. Look Quinn, you were my first girlfriend. I didn't know what I was supposed to feel or how to feel. I had feelings for you. I did. But after we broke up, when I started dating Rachel, it was…different." "SPARE ME!" She yells. "I hate you Finn Hudson." "Quinn, please. I'm trying to be honest with you. We have to stop lying to each other." "Oh that's lovely, Finn. Remind me that I lied to you. How wonderful." "Quinn, I wasn't even talking about the baby shit. But really, if I'm being honest, that shit still pisses me off." She steps back from me surprised because I have never cussed at her before. "You and I never had this conversation Quinn. We never talked about what you did. And I thought I was ok with it. But I'm not. I'm still angry that you lied to me about it. Were you ever going to tell me the truth. If Rachel hadn't found out and told me first, would you have told me?" She looks like I slapped her. She leans against the car. "No." she whispers. "I had no intention of telling you. I was so angry that I was pregnant. That I was losing my life. I couldn't do it alone. I needed you. So I lied. And I would have continued to do it if it meant you would stay." Well at least we are finally being honest.

"Quinn, don't you see, we needed to talk about this stuff. Instead we just started dating each other again. But I was hurt over Rachel kissing Puck. Of all people, Puck. She went after him just like you did. And I was so angry at her. At you. I wanted you both to hurt. So I went after you. I used you to make myself feel better. Taking you from Sam, it hurt you, and it hurt Rachel. And I realize that what I did was no better than what you or Rachel did." She's crying and leaning against me. "Why don't you love me, Finn?" I sigh and pull her in to a hug. "I can't love you Quinn. Maybe before, maybe it would have been possible. But I just….." "You're still in love with Rachel." She says looking up at me. "I am Quinn, she hurt me, and maybe I'm still angry about it. But I love her. And my heart isn't over that. And being in there with her, it was like having the air sucked out of me. I can't breathe. It's like having 50 emotions at once. " "So now what?" she asks. "Now, I think I should take you home." "Finn, are we over?" I pause and lean back against the car. "I'm sorry." I say with my voice trembling. "I never meant to hurt you again Quinn. I just can't do this." She turns and gets in the car. "Just take me home ok?"

I get in and start the car. We drive back to her house in silence. I glance at her a couple of times and see tears on her cheek but she doesn't look my way. I feel terrible. I really never meant for any of this to happen. I don't know how I managed to screw this up so badly. I realize that I needed time to work out my feelings for Rachel. But instead I jumped for Quinn. And I knew breaking her and Sam up would make me feel better. Somehow having it happen to someone else. Someone who wasn't me for a change felt good. And knowing that it hurt Rachel, while I didn't want to hurt her, I knew that seeing me with Quinn was the perfect punishment. I never even realized I wanted to punish her for hurting me. Like she wanted to punish me for sleeping with Santana, for keeping it from her. It's a circle of never ending pain that way. And it has to stop.

I pull up at Quinn's house. She grabs the handle and opens the door. "Quinn." I say quietly. "Don't Finn. I really just don't want to talk to you anymore. I'm tired." She gets out of the car and walks to her house. I feel bad for hurting her, but I also feel free. Somehow I feel like a weight was lifted from my shoulders. I look in my rear view mirror and for the first time in a while I actually look at myself. I haven't been able to look myself in the eye for months now. But as hard as tonight was, I needed to do this. For me. I pull out of the drive and head towards my house. I'm three blocks past my house when I realize I'm driving back to the bowling alley. I pull in to the parking lot and see Kurt's car still parked in the same spot. I turn off the car and for the first time in months I allow myself to cry. I've been trying to hold everything together for so long. I never let myself fall apart. But there is no other way to put the pieces back together unless you fully break them down first. I need to find myself again. I need to do what I should have done in the first place. I need to find me. And I need to face what happened.

Why did I lie to Rachel about Santana? I realize I was at fault in the breakdown of our relationship too. Had I just told her the truth would things have happened differently? Rachel is big on telling the truth even if it hurts. But if I had told her, when she told me about Jesse, she would have been mad. But I realize, she would have also forgiven me. She always did that. Always found it in her heart to look past my mistakes. It's one of the things I love so much about her. Her ability to let go of her past with everyone. Maybe if I spent more time looking at the whole picture instead of just her faults and what she did, maybe I would find my answers. Maybe I just need to go back to the beginning. I know I love Rachel. I will always love Rachel. She is the other half of my heart. But in the beginning, she was my best friend. And she never let me get away with being a jerk. She always called me on it. I chuckle to myself as I think back on all the times we went in rounds last year. I need her. I need my friend back. The rest of it, we can work on that later. But right now, I just need Rachel to be my friend. I'm lost without her.

Go back to the beginning Hudson. I get out of the car and walk back into the bowling alley. I see Rachel sitting back clapping for Kurt as he bows. This is where I want to be. I've got time to work out how I feel about Rachel. But for now, I belong here with my friends. I walk over to them and Rachel stands up to get her ball. She sees me coming and looks surprised. "Finn? I thought you left?" she says. "I did. Bowling isn't Quinn's thing." I laugh. "I took her home. I thought uh maybe I could join you guys?" I say hesitantly. They look at each other. "Oh, now you want to join huh. After we've bowled three games and you know we are both not on the top of our games anymore!" Kurt says laughing. "You have me figured out Kurt!" I say grabbing a ball. "Fine, you're in next game!" He says. Rachel walks up to the line and lets the ball go. She knocks down all the pins. "SPARE! Did you see that Kurt, I'm in the lead now!" She runs over and sits down next to me. "Ok princess relax, it's one game. I'll get you on the next one!" Kurt says getting up and taking his ball.

"You ok?" Rachel asks me sitting down. "You know, I think I am." I say smiling at her. "That's good. I was worried about you earlier. You seemed sad." "I was. I think I've missed too many Friday night bowling nights with you two. Not anymore ok?" Her eyes light up as she smiles from ear to ear. "I'm really happy to hear that Finn, but are you sure Quinn will be ok with that?" I nod. "Yeah, seems I'm going to be having a lot more time on my own from now on." "Oh" She says. "I'm sorry, Finn." "I'm not. I've missed my two best friends." I say patting her on the leg. I look into her eyes for the first time in a long time and my heart skips a beat. I have missed her. Eventually I will tell her that. We have a lot to talk about. But right now, I just want to enjoy time with my friends. "Ok hot shot, you're up." Kurt says after adding my name to the computer. "Look out you two, Finn Hudson is about to bowl you away!" "OH LORD!" Kurt says "That was awful" "Oh come on, don't tell me you haven't missed my humor." They look at each other and grin. "Fine, we missed you, but don't let that go to your head Hudson!" Kurt says handing him the ball. I walk up to the line and throw my ball knocking down all the pins. I turn back towards the bench and catch Rachel's eye. And as she smiles at me I realize that everything I need will come in time. Right now, I'm right where I belong.

**Stacy – Gleefully Finchel**

**This was a request I received to write a bowling story. So I'm dedicating this one to Angie (angelgleek). Hope you liked it. **


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